…”but I don’t need therapy – there is nothing wrong with me”.
Just the word THERAPY scares some people. We associate getting any sort of help for our mental health with being weak, unable to cope and failing at life. Only depressed or anxious people need help – only troubled or weak people need to explore their thoughts and the workings of their mind.
So many people assume that since they are doing “okay”, since there is nothing “wrong” – that seeing a psychotherapist, clinical psychologist or coach would be a waste of time. Similarly, employers do not see the value in getting one-on-one support for those in their organisations if everyone seems to be doing “okay”. Yet there is a very wide gap between coping and thriving. One-on-one psychological interventions are a very powerful tool for enabling individuals to push past their limiting beliefs and lead their life at their happiest and healthiest.
Most of our thoughts and beliefs are formed through our early life experiences. If we had an overly controlling parent we may fear authority figures much later on in life. If we grew up in a family where there was never enough money, we may not believe we are able to ask for that raise or bonus even into our 40s. If we have had a bad experience with a partner in the past, it may take us a long time to trust others again. If in our childhood our mum rewarded us with an ice-cream when we did well at school, we may still reward ourselves with chocolate or another sweet treat once we get through a long, stressful day at work. Most of our thoughts and beliefs are subconscious patterns that we have learnt over time and that we have very little conscious control over. Most forms of one-on-one psychological support (such as psychotherapy) help us to unpick where our beliefs and thoughts come from and how we can then go about changing these to enable us to lead happier and more fulfilling lives.
Yet very few people, especially those that believe they are doing “okay”, ever question why they view the world in a certain way. It is as though we are viewing the world through a pair of faulty glasses (created through our life experiences) but we never even think about taking these off and checking whether we can see the world better without them. Therapy allows you to take these glasses off, to try on other pairs and create a world view that serves you best…so that you aren’t living your life through the lens of a 5 year old who just wanted ice-cream and was scared of their dad.
Very often we don’t understand why we think the way we do, or realise that our beliefs are rooted in our past experiences or culture. Yet allowing ourselves to explore our thoughts and beliefs really gives us the power to design our lives much more consciously – so that we can pick and choose to maintain only those thoughts and beliefs that really serve us.
So whilst most people think…”but I don’t need therapy – there is nothing wrong with me”, those fortunate few who have had the chance to experience the transformational therapy process are often asking themselves “what can I pretend is wrong with me – so that I get the chance to further transform?”
“I’ve realised therapy is incredibly therapeutic” – Lisa Schroeder